Freshman

We are still young. Young enough to not take any responsibility. But when we get busted who is it to blame. It wouldn't you nor would it be. Perhaps we blame it on someone else. Maybe her the one who always sits by the side of the room? Or maybe the guy who keeps asking questions ridiculous questions? Or maybe we should blame the man who fail to clean the floor? Maybe we should blame god for playing these ridiculous pranks on us. But can we? We are struck in confusion, looking into each others eyes, thinking if there was one more thing we could do for him what would it be.  Listen to what he was saying? See him for one last time which none of us did for 3 years? We have been selfish maybe that was how we went to live at this age. We are still fresh, none of us really understood what nature is capable of. But we keep taunting that beast.

Bench

They sat on different sides of the bench, but it seemed a whole world were placed between them. It was a sad sight to look at. They obviously knew each other but they did not speak to each other. When their eyes met, all there was was a nod, a soft nod that says we used to be so close but look at where we are now. The rain poured heavily, the drip drop of the rain orchestrated the night. It was a sad sound. The two shuffled and shuffled, in response to each other. They were trying to spark up a conversation, however they are getting no where. They waited for the train. It was pouring. Yes it definitely was. A sad sight indeed. I watched them. But then the girl dropped her umbrella and feel slowly after it. The man reached out for her. He reached out to her. Their eyes met once again. Perhaps, something new was about to start. Perhaps there was a spark.

Prices

Is it necessary to put a price on everyone in life? Many things in this world are priceless, but modernisation happens to add a price tag on life. Do I have to quantitatively describe how i feel or how much i like something? This idea seems to dumb down all concepts in life, making things seem worthless. It is quite ironic that the most beautiful in life are priceless and most expensive. People will hate it if i pay someone to be a friend or a lover. I hate it as well. Time for us to revise about life.

Same

Now i wonder, what really matters~
Cause my heart is the same
Well, I wonder, how did I get here~
But everything is still the same
And i wonder, why we cant get there~
Yet, i cant do anything about it
But then you say we'll get somewhere~
So I just want to say

I know you don't want me but is it cause of hate
And then you want me to think that you love me
Only, if I am the same
Only, if i am the same

Yes, I wonder have I changed now~
And hope you remain the same
But then I wonder why i still worry~
So now wouldn't it be the same
I wonder where I'll be~
Where nothing else left
But i want you to say

I know you don't want me but is it cause of hate
And then you want me to think that you love me
Only, if I am the same
Only, if i am the same




note this is not a poem> it just something random in my head that i sing

Incomplete

After all these happens, I told myself that it is indeed time to get over it all. But, there is a vague sense of dissatisfaction that keeps on telling me that i should do something more about it. For 1 and a half years, my interest, my effort and my struggle. It seemed like i have done nothing for it. Time is telling me that i need to something more to it. Some that may be confronting or rather outrageous. Instead of trying to playing it safe, I need to do something and take risks. In the end, playing it safe and playing it outrageously have the same consequence. This leads me to consider maybe i shouldve been ruthless from the very start. So next time I promise my self. I will break through the barrier and add something else, before adding a full stop. I need to put a full stop cause a new paragraph can start.

Me in 10 years

To me in 10 years time,

I would like to see you develop something that characterises yourself, instead of being a peaceable asshole. You need to make your own life work for yourself, instead of trying and stealing parts from other people's life. In 10 years, I would like you to cast away the juvenile ways and live as a man, live as someone who takes responsibility and also risk. You are expected to have already quit smoking and begin to have your own family. That is, you have found your happiness and stay committed in it. I have no doubt in you being loyal because loyalty is one of the very skill that Elton mastered. I hope you have not lost that skill and instead become a dick-head. I've expected to have settled down and found yourself a job. I would like to see my own son or daughter and the fact that you are a loving father. I would like you to overcome your annoyance with dogs. 

In 10 years, I will come again and look at this .

See ya.

Start

If i was going to go back in time, where would i start? From the very beginning? Or maybe half way through? Or maybe just recently where things haven't been too well for me? I don't know. I don't know where i would start. I am rather scared about this miraculous opportunity that is given. The fact every decisions you make when you go to the past. Every step would be different. Lets say you decide to "correct" one part in your life, there will be a chain reaction that changes every other aspect of your life. The end result of the change maybe more disastrous than planned. I think this desire to go back and change life is futile.