Bookshelf

People from.my generation don't read, I am just one of the special people who found the joy within books. It is enticing and fascinating. Books are limitless as to.what they contain, because the main elements within a book lies within the imagination of the reader. If the reader can't find their space for imagination, then they wouldnt be able to understand the art within books.
Here is a list of the books i.must have on my book shelf in the future:
catcher in the rye
brave new world
old man and the sea
of mice and men
anna karenina
1984
fahrenheit 451
picture of dorian gray
dr jekyll and.mr.hyde
the sense of an ending
pride and prejudice
sherlock.holmes
there will.be more to.come

thank god

THANKS TO.SOJU, IM FINALLY OUT OF THE SHIT STATE I WAS HAVING FOR 2 DAYS. MAN IM NOT GONNA SAY ILL.NEVER TAKE WEED AGAIN BUT AFTER JUST 3 HOURS OF SUBCONSCIOUS CONTROL, MY MOOD WAS MADE SHIT FOR 2 FUCKING DAYS. FOR FUCK SAKES DION. HAHA IM NOT BLAMING YOU, IM.KEEN FOR NEXT TIME IS ALL I HAVE TL SAY.

HOWEVER, THE THING IS I APPEAR TO.BE MORE HIGH WHEN.I DONT TAKE WEED IT IS. MY LIFE WORKS UPON THE CONTRARY, DICHOTMY OF THE FIXTURES IS WHAT I WOULD SAY.

svydrjaqd

Seriously is this the product of someone who fails to conform? Or is it that i just can't even talk about anything.meaningful with anyone? Does every conversation i have cant manage to.find itself through the greetings and find its way to some.other terrains? Seriously, not.a single person, like.not.even a guy. like fucking why.
fuck sakes

Move

I need to get out of this place. Before, i have this belief that Australia is the best place in the world due to its peaceful nature. But, i dont feel it anymore. Somehow peace irritates me. Being peaceful equals no arguments but wouldnt that also mean no life. Life is simply conflict. More accurately it is one's struggle to.defeat or overcome conflict. But how can we do.it when there is no.conflict in Australia. I want to start fresh in a place with no money, no shelter, no nothing. I honestly wouldnt mind spending part of.my life living in the subway station feeding off bread crumbs which may be days overdue. People in Australia thinks that you.will.die.just by eating that. No fucking way man look at Africans they are living fine. Well not the fine we define but they are happy in their own ways. Australia has been stagnant for too long it is not a place for dreams. Itll be time to.move on soon.

18

Im 18 yes i guess the only one who reached 18 from there. I arrived in a peaceful manner.
ONE OF THEM DIED. NEVER ABLE TO REACH 18.
ONE OF THEM SPENT THE NIGHT IN JAIL. ANOTHER ONE IS FAMOUS.

Resolution

So tonight, I had a pretty long conversation with my dad. It was too bad surprisingly. It became evident that in the end no matter what his ways are, he is still a dad.  However, he is no longer the man with immutable laws. He let loose a little tonight. He became understanding and saw that have absolute control over me is pointless.
Here are some points he addressed:
As a man of 18, i need to be responsible for all the decision you make. I would tell you that from tomorrow on you will need to act accordingly to morals and ethics. The past years were my effortless methods in developing your sagalicity. Anyways, from now on you are allowed to drink and smoke, i know i cant stop you but please be responsible. I like to advice you to not take drugs and smoke (sorry). And, about girls, if you do have a girl friend, please be responsible for her as well and treat them fairly.

It was a side I have never seen.

Anyways, from tomorrow,
I will be more responsible.
I will get rid of my non-seriousness when being serious.
I will quit smoking by the age of 26.

The next step is 25, another massive change and a part in me says that i should get married by them.

Drunk

To explore into.my.emotions this what i need. A bottle of spirit, me in mood swings, candles and private space make the perfect recipe to.understand myself. Also an essential piece i need is a diary. Honesty can only be achieved when one is subconscious. Being conscious just means that one will try to manipulate the truth that makes it easier for the person to handle.

MIRROR

SOMETIMES YOU STARE INTO THE MIRROR. YOU LOOK AT IT AND TRY TO PICK UP AS MANY FEATURES AS YOU THINK THAT DEFINES YOU. IT COULD BE THE FOLDING FAT ABOVE YOUR LEFT EYEBROW, PATCHES ON UNEVENLY GROWN HAIR BELOW YOUR CHIN. THOSE ARE THE FEAUTURES THAT MAKES YOU WHO YOU ARE. BUT WHAT IF ONE DAY YOU WAKE UP AND REALISE THAT IT IS NOT THE SAME AS BEFORE. YOU GOT A NEW FACE, A NEW BODY, A NEW IDENTITY. BUT WOULD YOU LIVE WITH THAT IDENTITY OR WOULD YOU BE TERRIFIED UNTIL YOUR WITS BECOMES FLOODED.

P.S. THIS IS SIMILAR TO MY DREAM ABOUT JANE 

she

I shouldnt have denied my feelings to her. It wasnt really the truth. I like her but i just cant say it out loud to anyone else that i like her. Most people do know that i like her though. I reckon she knows it herself. But i wouldnt dare to ask her. Im too scared for that well not about being rejected or anything but the fact that i have to confront people with a harsh true scares me. Being serious is not something im good at so yeh.
When my mum asked me to bring a girl to dinner on my bday, i really wanted to do something about it with her.